Meaning of "Nicole" by Ash

The lyrics of "Nicole" delve into the deep remorse and emotional turmoil of a person who made a devastating choice to end the life of their own child out of love, which has left them haunted by guilt. The repeated refrain of "I said no, I killed my baby but I loved her" underscores the conflicting emotions of the narrator, dealing with the inner conflict of having committed a tragic act despite caring deeply for the child. The mention of a fatal secret and scars that are healing in the mind and heart hint at a pain that cannot be easily erased, emphasizing the lasting impact of such a profound decision. The song captures the internal struggle, self-blame, and longing for the lost relationship with the child, expressing a raw and emotional depiction of the consequences of their actions.