Meaning of "How Am I Not Myself" by Bad Suns

The lyrics of "How Am I Not Myself" delve into the concept of self-identity and the search for inner peace. The opening lines, "Kissed by death, Struck by life, What did you find in search of peace?" suggest a deep introspection and questioning about the meaning of life and the pursuit of happiness. The speaker is in a state of confusion and seeks to find their true self.

The repeated question, "How am I not myself?" signifies a disconnect between their external appearance and their internal being. They feel as though they are wearing a mask or living a façade, highlighting the struggle to authentically express oneself. The reference to a "prison in my mind" further emphasizes this idea, suggesting that the speaker feels trapped within their own thoughts and emotions.

The use of the hourglass metaphor adds another layer of meaning to the lyrics. An hourglass represents the passage of time, reflecting the transient nature of life. The speaker sees their own experience as fleeting, encapsulated in the metaphorical hourglass of wine. This notion is both pleasant and unkind, emphasizing the bittersweet nature of existence.

Despite the existential ponderings and feelings of being lost, there is a glimmer of hope in the lyrics. The line "I'm awake, I'll figure it out" suggests a determination to discover their true self and find clarity. This implies a sense of self-awareness and a willingness to explore and understand one's own identity.

Overall, "How Am I Not Myself" delves into the complexities of self-identity and the search for inner peace. The lyrics express a sense of struggle and confusion, but ultimately convey a message of hope and the belief that one can awaken and find their true self.