The narrator acknowledges that they understand why their relationship is over and can go through the motions of moving on, but they struggle to stop thinking about their ex. They admit that they still want them and find themselves turning back to them despite the pain it causes.

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Meaning of "How Not To" by Dan + Shay


The lyrics of "How Not To" explore the difficulty of moving on from a past relationship. Despite knowing the reasons for the breakup and going through the motions of moving on, the narrator still finds themselves unable to stop thinking about their ex. This internal struggle is portrayed as a late-night battle, where the silence amplifies their thoughts and desires. The narrator recognizes the need to be strong and move on, but ultimately succumbs to their longing and finds themselves turning back to their ex. This cycle of returning and experiencing heartbreak in the morning creates a self-loathing within the narrator. They hate themselves for their inability to let go and the way they still want their former partner. The repetition of the line "I just don't know how not to," emphasizes the helplessness and confusion the narrator feels in trying to move on. The lyrics also touch upon the significant impact the ex has had on the narrator's life, comparing them to something as essential as breathing, and acknowledging that the heartbreak is worth it despite the pain. Overall, "How Not To" delves into the emotional turmoil of trying to let go of a past love but being unable to escape the lingering thoughts and desires.