Meaning of "Friends and Lovers" by Incubus

The lyrics of "Friends and Lovers" explore the idea of accepting someone for who they are, flaws and all. The narrator refers to themselves as a "ne'er do well" and someone who constantly runs away from commitment, symbolized by "black gold." However, they recognize that it is time to stop and take a closer look at their relationship. The metaphor of the other person's "porcelain shell" or exoskeleton suggests that they may appear fragile on the outside, but underneath lies their true strength.

The chorus emphasizes the bond between the two individuals, stating that they are both friends and lovers. The lyrics suggest that even though they might not be perfect individually, their connection and understanding of each other can overcome any challenges. The narrator expresses a willingness to embrace the other person's flaws, suggesting that what is wrong with them is compatible with what is wrong with themselves.

The second verse explores the idea of barriers and walls that separate people from where they truly belong. The lyrics imply that these barriers should be torn down and that the individuals should stick together. The line, "Abandon all the bones/ We've got to pick," suggests that they should let go of past grudges or grievances that can weigh them down and prevent progress. Instead, they should start a collection of everything they are not and everything they will not be, emphasizing the uniqueness of their connection.

The bridge of the song delivers a powerful message about acceptance" style="color:inherit; font-weight:900; background-color: #ebfbd3;">self-acceptance and not allowing others' judgment to define their relationship. The lyrics state that they should never have to defend their friendship and love because it is a genuine and profound connection. By asserting their confidence in their bond, they challenge the negativity and criticism from others, symbolized by the stones being thrown.

Overall, "Friends and Lovers" conveys the message that flaws and imperfections can actually strengthen a relationship. It celebrates the idea of accepting someone completely and cherishing the special connection between friends and lovers.