Meaning of "Ashes" by KT Tunstall

The lyrics of "Ashes" delve into the dynamics of a challenging relationship where the protagonist seems to be aware of the strain they put on the other person. The reference to being a "pain in your ass" and twisting their arm metaphorically paints a picture of manipulation and difficulty. The lines about being a mirror and wanting someone to "be the workhouse of the energy" reflect a desire for a deep connection but also a need for the other person to bear the brunt of emotional labor. Despite the conflicts and disagreements, there is a strange bond that is portrayed, where even in burnout and fallout, there is an acknowledgment that their fates are intertwined, as seen in the idea that "your ashes come home to me." The back and forth of pushing boundaries and seeking understanding is captured in the image of taking a walk to make sense, only to have it end in a harsh rejection. The closing lines about no other "sucker" having them on the mantelpiece could be seen as a bitter acceptance of the complicated nature of their relationship, where despite the drama, there is a reluctance to let go. Overall, the lyrics explore themes of conflict, push-and-pull dynamics, and the complex nature of relationships.