Meaning of "I'm Thinking About Horses" by Mansionz
The lyrics delve into deep introspection and existential questioning. The speaker ponders the nature of God, questioning whether God is a male or female entity or simply a universal force. They contemplate whether God actively controls every aspect of life or set things in motion and moved on. The mention of events like wars, diseases, and the Holocaust suggest a search for meaning in the face of suffering and tragic events. The idea that these experiences may be just a prelude or rehearsal before something greater comments on the speaker's sense of insignificance and the possibility of a larger purpose.
The lyrics then shift focus to the speaker's personal actions and desires. They reflect on their own behavior, oscillating between honor and kindness during the day to boredom and objectification at night. They reach out to someone, using the excuse of boredom to engage in sexual conversation, highlighting the conflict between their desires and their conscience.
The mention of horses introduces the theme of freedom and captivity. The speaker admires horses for their strength and beauty but questions why they choose to submit to human control. This leads to self-reflection as the speaker considers their own choices and the ways in which they may be similarly surrendering freedom in their own life. The comparison between horses and humans emphasizes the complexity and contradictions of personal agency.
The lyrics then explore the speaker's relationship with their father, who is growing older. The impending change and the speaker's uncertainty about being ready for it suggest a fear of the unknown and the passage of time. The speaker recalls their father's teachings about love and sacrifice but expresses feeling disconnected from these ideals. They question their own capacity for love and selflessness, using youth as an excuse but realizing it is no longer valid. The contemplation of potential homosexuality adds another layer of self-discovery and identity exploration.
Thoughts on death emerge in the lyrics as the speaker reflects on the possibility of a plane crash. They express a sense of acceptance and even welcome the idea, suggesting a lack of fear or fulfillment in life. They consider the potential impact of their death, acknowledging the morbid fascination people have with tragic endings and the desire for closure. The realization that they are currently just a "story" that drags on hints at a yearning for a more significant or dramatic conclusion.
The mention of Otis, Curt, and Dilla brings in the artist's personal references, adding a touch of nostalgia or tribute to influential figures. The reference to changing their hair color to green introduces a theme of societal judgment and the struggle for acceptance. The speaker notes the sudden negative reactions they receive, serving as a reminder of society's narrow views and biases.
Overall, the lyrics of "I'm Thinking About Horses" touch on themes of existentialism, personal identity, the search for meaning, and the desire for a meaningful ending or impact.