Meaning of "Scar" by Missy Higgins

In "Scar," Missy Higgins explores the theme of how relationships can shape and impact one's sense of self. The lyrics describe two contrasting relationships that have left scars on the singer's emotional well-being. The first verse tells the story of a partner who leaves behind instructions for the singer to cleanse herself thoroughly, suggesting that she needs to change and become more like him. This partner represents societal pressures and expectations, symbolized by the triangle trying to fit through a circle. The singer's refusal to conform and the realization that she knows herself better than anyone is a rebellion against the pressure to conform to someone else's standards.

The second verse introduces a new character who initially seems nurturing and caring, represented by the bag of treats and the sweet scent. However, this person turns out to be just as manipulative as the first partner. They deliberately pull at the singer's stitches, metaphorically unraveling her sense of self and tearing her apart emotionally. This character represents the naive belief that one person can save or fix another, only to realize that they are just as flawed and destructive.

Through these experiences, the singer becomes disillusioned with the idea that everyone wants more and that conforming to societal expectations leads to happiness. She realizes the importance of individuality and self-preservation, rejecting the notion of being controlled or losing herself in a relationship. The line "I see I'm not the only one who's young at heart and it aches for us to have grown apart" suggests that many people can relate to feeling pressured to conform and losing their authentic selves in the process.

The repetition of the chorus emphasizes the familiarity of these experiences, suggesting that these situations are common and relatable. The singer questions why people tend to follow the same patterns and expectations, yet she refuses to conform. The final request to be left with a scar symbolizes a reminder of her past experiences and the strength she has gained from them, serving as a testament to her ability to withstand and overcome emotional adversity.

In essence, "Scar" is about the struggle to maintain one's identity and individuality in the face of societal pressures and toxic relationships. It encourages listeners to embrace their scars and use them as reminders of their strength and resilience.