Meaning of "Ways to Disappear" by Palisades

"Ways to Disappear" delves into the struggles of someone who is haunted by their inner demons and fears. The first stanza sets the tone by highlighting the speaker's inclination to avoid attention and stay within the safety of their own walls. They describe themselves as a ghost, trapped in endless circles around someone they desire to be close to. However, there is an underlying contradiction; while they long to breathe the same air as this person, the toxic smoke within their own mind is suffocating them.

The chorus expresses the speaker's desperate desire to find an escape from their troubles. They feel their words lack clarity, reflecting their inability to effectively communicate or confront their fears. The line "I'm not good at letting go, I can't stand to be alone" reveals their deep-rooted fear of being alone and their struggle with detachment. They yearn for someone who will guide them through their darkness, like a guiding light leading them down the road. The repeated plea to "take me home" suggests a longing for a sense of belonging and safety, a place where they can let go of their anxieties.

In the second verse, the speaker confesses to holding tightly onto memories, fearing the consequences of facing the truth. They acknowledge the possibility that it may be better if the person they desire never knows the depths of their struggles. The following lines express a yearning to escape from reality, even if it means engaging in self-destructive behaviors or starting a metaphorical war. Despite this, they admit to lying to those around them, revealing their internal struggle of hiding their true emotions while trying to accept their reality.

The final chorus presents a shift in the narrative. The speaker still seeks ways to disappear and their words remain unclear, but now they also express a need to find the courage to face their fears. They are no longer satisfied with escaping; they want to find a way to confront their struggles head-on. The repetition of "I found the light that takes me down the road, until it leads me home" reflects a glimmer of hope and resolution. The light represents a guiding force, potentially symbolizing a person or a newfound strength within themselves that will help them find their way home, a place of acceptance and peace.